Being shaken and rattled all night. Bashed, flung onto rocks, battered without pain, broken to pieces by a darker, larger force – and the surrendering is easy. No fear.
Being taken under the arms and shaken out of my skin, so much attachment, so many strong links, pulling and thrusting. Gentle and determined hands sliding along my inner body and peeling it away from my outer skin. How long it takes, how firmly all is one, how fiercely, ferociously, unwaveringly I am dying to the old – the process of reemergence as the me that had always been waiting to be.
Like my dragon swans unwinding the snake that winds too tightly around my chest, my heart, my throat, my lungs. The snake the prevents my being fully in the light, out in the world as me with voice, heart, dance, soul and song. With different movements. Stepping forward with all of me, not just offering part of me, not just sending my loyal soldiers, not just baring my wounded child.
Holding my loyal soldiers, those who have protected me so well, given me a magical, wonderful life, in my arms, looking into each others eye so sweetly, knowing each other so well, honoring the life we have been able to give each other.
Giving each other sacred vows to help each other bring love and passion fully into this world and receive it and have it be received.
Being broken open – and finding the promise it will kill me to break is again never to close again – never to go back to sleep.